by Sarah Ahn



I’ve been back from my trip to the DPRK for just about a week now. In that time, I’ve been trying to make sense of what the trip means or should mean here. There is so much I learned and experienced that it is hard to put into words, but I will write about what I think can be the most meaningful in our context here in the US. During my first days in the DPRK, I felt a sadness and hopelessness (among many other emotions) because I could see and feel how different this half of the country was.

Though I grew up in the US, I always had a sense of my Koreaness’ and a connection to my roots. I think like most Korean Americans, that connection was to South Korea; though I had never traveled there, it was where my family came from, where we would hear news from, where guests would visit from and what I imagined ‘Korea’ to be. The DPRK was, in many ways, familiar, but so different. Not only from the South and the Korean community I know here but from the world. Even though I cringe every time I hear disparaging references to the DPRK as being closed and hermit-ed from the world, in a sense it is true. The world has moved on. And yes, the DPRK has also changed, but not in the same direction as the rest of the globalized world.



The first days felt like a group tour, moving from one monument to another museum, all throughout hearing about the accomplishments of the people and nation. Despite my boredom at times, we were learning about the nation’s interpretation of history, its understanding of the current world order, and its pride and will. Through it, I realized this country will never break or fold to international pressures because to them, the international community is corrupt and ruled by a hostile US. I also started to wonder and despair about what our role can be in facilitating peace and reunification when all parties seem so stubborn. Yes, the international community is biased, but how can those who are working on the grassroots level circumvent that and work together on an international level? I felt small and confused.

The second half of this reflection should share what I then learned, how my thinking was turned around by the end of the trip. Unfortunately that is not the case. As our coordinator told us in the beginning, on your first trip, you are left with more questions than answers and that is indeed true. But I did learn to embrace those questions with the hope that we can all come to a conclusion one day. How can we build when we don't speak the same language and that can't be solved with translation? I realize now that this is a painstaking process that requires commitment and understanding.

As we came back to the US and Canada, we were once again met with the usual rhetoric of fear and hate around the DPRK. Nodutdol is once again being pitted as a pro-North organization, which I think is interpreted at best as being simply naïve and at worst, as freedom-hating, genocide apologists. While I’ve never paid mind to what the right wing has to say about us, I do feel even the ‘left’ or progressive movement often demonizes the North or stays silent. I have in the past as well, because there are many aspects to the country that I cannot understand and that goes against my understanding of what ‘freedom’ and ‘justice’ means. And I still have my conflicts but if we are ever to get anywhere in this process of reconciliation, something needs to change. We need to start dealing with our differences and speaking a new language.

I have little faith that peace talks on the government level will ever be able to commit to such a process I described above. But what fails on the top doesn't have to impact how we proceed as people. As one Deeper said, reunification begins with the heart. And the mind I would add. Ultimately, the power for true reconciliation lies in our hands and we have to believe that we have the power to do that- people to people and only then can we force the governments to take the last steps in making this reunification a reality.

About Nodutdol eNews

Nodutdol eNews is the monthly e-mail newsletter of Nodutdol.Through grassroots organization and community development, Nodutdol seeks to bridge divisions created by war, nation, gender, sexual orientation, language, classes and generation among Koreans and to empower our community to address the injustice we and other people of color face here and abroad. Nodutdol works in collaboration with other progressive organizations locally, nationally and internationally as part of a larger movement for peace and social change.

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